Stuck Between the Person I Was and The Person I'm Called To Be

Any season of transformation feels like a Chicago winter...long, but you know something great is coming. Contrary to the belief of some in this world, change doesn't always come at the end of a sudden revelation. It doesn't come at the wave of a wand. It doesn't come in a Christmas box.

Getting to where you're calledto go isn't as easy as simply pointing it out on the map, ESPECIALLY if you don't have a map. You need to figure out the "best" way to get to point B...mind, body and spirit...full presence.

Will you go the fast and easy route? What are you gaining and what are you losing when you choose this route?
Do you have the resources and drive to take the road less traveled?
Will you take in the scenery or is it too distracting?
Can you be fully present if you're on a schedule and others are waiting?
What will you take with you? Be cautious and prepare for all possible issues? Not possible. So scrap the packrat idea.
Take as little as possible. Sounds good, but will you be bold enough to do that? Bold enough to know that you will need to rely on others and on your sense of survival?
These are the questions that rattle around in my head.

Speaking of boldness...we've talked about knowing the place you need to go and how to prepare for the journey BUT we've not talked about the courage to MOVE. I read somewhere that a male character of the Bible (I forget who) kept praying for God to show him the way to go in his life. His wife, tired of his incessant prayers and not quite sure what to say, yelled, "Do NOT ask Him to show you the way if you are not willing to move your feet!!".

Who I was appears to be similar but different from who I am and I am definitely working my way to whom I'm called to be. As a seminarian on the slow track to ministry, I feel very much in between. I feel myself putting the pedal to the metal in my God-mobile but someone has put a 2-cylnder engine (not even a 4-cylinder) into my vehicle...as if to say "all in due time". Anyone else feeling that?

Replay

It seems like we're constantly in a kind of "replay" mode in our lives. We're doing something over and over again OR time has lapsed between a behavior or thought but yet repeated itself. Here I am again...thinking about restarting this blog. And I will rinse and repeat until I get to the right conclusion for me.